Grieving the death of your baby during the holidays can be challenging. The thought of being surrounded by happy friends and family celebrating the holidays, feeling sad amongst a group of people who just want you to be happy, wanting to stay home in your comfy clothes instead of dressing up, braving the cold and going elsewhere to celebrate, bracing yourself for when a well-intentioned person says the wrong thing….all that and more can just add to the challenge of celebrating the holidays.
From one bereaved mom to another, the best thing you can do for yourself is to unashamedly do what is best for you. If the thought of being in a large group of festive people (friends or family) is too overwhelming, kindly decline the invitation and stay home. If you attend a social gathering of friends or family and it becomes too much, kindly excuse yourself and go home. Tell the host in advance if you can that you may duck out early if it becomes too much.
Honor, remember and incorporate your child into the holidays in the way(s) that feel right to you. Say their name, buy them an ornament to put on your tree, light a candle in their memory…there are so many ways that you can keep your child a part of your celebrations.
Below is a collection of links to different articles on grieving during the holidays. Hopefully one or a few of them will give you ideas on how to cope, how to incorporate your baby into them, how to survive the holidays.